Weight Loss Starts With 'P'

On a visit to the doctor about two months ago, I had a visit with a dietitian on the premises.  She was there to consult with me on how I might go about lowering my blood sugar levels.  Being diagnosed with Type II diabetes a few years ago, my daily dose of Metformin can only do so much.  I decided to try to eat healthier, introducing more vegetables to my diet.  For those who follow my Twitter account (@ToontownJuggalo), you may have seen some of my pictures of prepared meals.  I'm quite proud of my tasty concoctions and don't mind promoting my culinary genius when possible.  There was discussion at the time about placing me on a new drug, called "Forxiga" (For-zee-ga), that would work in conjunction with the medication I'm already taking.  The prescription for that, however, would have to wait until I had a different test performed on my downstairs region.

Eventually, I met back up with the dietitian to further discuss my diabetic situation.  In the months in between meets, I was to test my blood on a semi-regular basis.  Semi-regular because due to my limited income, I can't afford the test strips required to test my blood.  The drug companies who control the sale of test strips have diabetics at a great disadvantage, as strips cost a f*ck-load of money.  Thankfully, the dietitian lady had free samples and was able to provide me with the testing equipment and strips.  On this visit, it was decided that we go ahead with the introduction of this new drug, Forxiga.

Information was provided prior to my filling the prescription briefly details what is to be expected from taking the pills, in addition, a list of the most common side effects was also listed.  Generally, this list is my favourite part of any prospective drug.  The most prominent is headaches, back pain, pain in my arms, frequent urination, constipation and diarrhea.  Ironically, I already suffer from headaches and back pain, so nothing new there.  The pain in the arms is new and if I forget, I begin to suspect I'm having a heart attack, before I remember.  I have been peeing a lot more, both in frequency and duration, but that's a major part of the drug's purpose as excess sugar is disposed in this manner.  As for the last two symptoms, I'm happy to report neither is affecting me.

Another positive to this new drug, aside from the guarantee that I will be receiving it free-of-charge for the next twelve months, is because of the frequent urination, weight loss is also associated with the taking of the drug.  Although I've only been taking Forxiga for about a week, I've already lost a couple of pounds, and that's considering the ample amounts of junk food I consumed over this past weekend.  Imagine the slick sexy self that will emerge when eating a more healthy diet along with the medicine.  Move over, Bert Kreischer, I'm bringing sexy back!! 

"Bringing sexy back!! That's a laugh!!"

Dance With Death - Part One

Tuesday night I found myself short of breath, partnered with an painful ache in my back.  Having injured my back, drastically, back in January.  Although I've been feeling a helluva lot better in the months since, I thought I might have tweaked my back.  Not the case.  The shortness of breath increased, followed by vomiting, sweats and chills.  Finally on day 3, I went to the hospital.

It's pneumonia.  Spent the entire day, hooked up to oxygen and an I.V., before getting uprooted and sent to another hospital, where I remained under observation and tethered to either an oxygen outlet on the wall or an oxygen tank that I could take along with me to the john, if needed.  I was allowed at 3:30am to wander out, oxygen tank in tow, to search for a soda machine.  Best damned Diet Pepsi, everrrr.  Dressed in a housecoat, to cover my sexy butt, I had to pass through security to get back to observation, and the dude actually had to ask if I was a patient...  "Seriously?" I asked, referencing the housecoat and oxygen tank.

More than twenty-four hours later, closer to twenty-six, I was allowed to return home, with a prescription for anti-biotics in-hand.  I went to pick-up said prescription and god damn it that motherf*cker had a price tag of over $72.  For 9 pills.  One pill a day is all I'm required to take, and they want $72 for that shit.  I flat out refused to pay and opted not to take the pills.

Most of my family.., nay all of my family would pay the outrageous price then bitch and moan about it.  I'm more the type to thumb my nose at the establishment and say F*ck you.  Seventy-two bucks for nine f*cking pills?  Complete bullshit.

This isn't my first go around with pneumonia.  This is actually my fourth bout with the deadly virus.  Two years ago it was quite serious, more so because when the hospital took x-rays, they found a little extra goody on my right lung.  Described at first as an anomaly, it later became a mass, then a large mass.  Although the mystery seemed to get worse, the specialist seeing over my case, seemed to down play it, finally telling me in October of last year that she was sure it was "nothing".  Fast forward to this past Thursday, where I was treated to an x-ray AND a CT Scan, I was informed that this "black mass" has increased in size.  That it may be a contributing factor as to why I've become so susceptible to sickness as of late.  The physician also told me some other doctor-jargon, a bunch of latin-sounding words that didn't make any sense to me, but by the serious tone the doctor kept and the first sign of compassion he'd shown toward anyone that day, had convinced me that I was in store for a whole lot of shit.

Taking into consideration that my life may be in jeopardy as a result of this latest bout of sickness, should I really be concerned with a $72 bill for anti-biotics...?  Yeah...  I don't think my life is worth shelling out $72.  Not for nine f*cking pills.