When I'm at work, I need the radio to be playing. When I first started the job, I went weeks without a radio and often found myself either distracted and unable to concentrate on the work in front of me. Either that or I'd often find myself singing, under my breath, whatever song happened to grind it's way into the inner sanctum of my brain. Eddie Grant's Electric Avenue was stuck in there a lot and I've come to dislike the song, somewhat. That one and Don MacLean's American Pie. "What?!?" I'm sure someone is thinking, right now after reading that statement, but try getting it stuck in your head for weeks at a time.
Eventually, when I grew too tired of composing my own songs just to entertain myself when I was alone driving the bus, I got my self a radio, albeit a transistor radio at first, which only received a signal when I worked on the east side of the city. Anything west of Idylwyld Drive, was met with constant static interruptions, which aggravated me as much as it annoyed me. Next I got a small speaker from Visions which worked well, but only lasted about five, maybe six hours, if I was lucky. So it was back to the ol' drawing board, one more time. This time I didn't cheap out by purchasing something from the discontinued aisle. Instead, I went to Costco and purchased a JBL speaker which, despite being dropped a handful of times, works like a motherf**king charm.
I spent my mornings listening to Clayton and Stacie on Cruz-FM and in the afternoons, I would either listen to Regina's The Wolf or Saskatoon's Rock 102 FM. Especially after Cruz shit-canned their afternoon guy, the legendary Dave 'Muzik' Morgan. His replacement sucks. Then a few months later, I switched over to Rock 102 FM, exclusively, when Cruz went on another inexplicable firing tirade and fired the morning guy, Clayton Kroeker. Stacie is awesome, but she doesn't have the chops to broadcast alone, so I deserted the radio station in favour of greener pastures and I'm glad I did.
I began listening to Whitney in the afternoons on Rock 102 FM and she's a blast to listen to. Always in a jovial mood, I can only imagine the joy it must be to work with someone like this, who always seems to be in good spirits.
One day Whitney was trying to help out this guy who'd called in. He had two tickets to see his favourite band, but his dilemma was choosing who to go to the show with. Either his wife or his daughter. Whitney had all sorts of people calling in offering up ideas and so with a few minutes to spare on my route, I overcame the anxiety I have about placing phone calls (*I imagine there's a blog in there about that) and I called in to the radio station. Whitney was a hoot to chat with and she played right along with the insanity that I offered up. I simply stated, "He should take his daughter. Wives come and go," I added, "But daughters are forever." I don't know exactly why I stated it like that, I don't even have a daughter...., or a wife, for that matter, but Whitney got a helluva kick out of the statement and for several months that followed, I'd hear my raspy radio voice repeating that statement during some of the radio breaks.
Not long after that, Sully joined the Rock 102 crew and he fit in like a glove. The two of them, Whitney and Sully, are like long lost siblings. The way they tease each other, you can sense that there's a lot of love and respect shared between the two, but when Whitney is "bullying" Sully (for lack of a better term), the results are hilarious. Sully being from Vancouver, originally, the radio station has been trying to "Saskatchewanize" Sully. They did a question and answer portion on the show one day, in which poor Sully got an electric shock every time he answered a Saskatchewan question incorrectly, but truth be known, I've been here my entire life, minus a six month stint in Edmonton, Alberta, and I'm not familiar with a lot of the "Saskatchewan terminology" that Sully was failing to answer correctly. I've often thought about challenging him to a Saskatchewan-off in a year's time. See if this Vancouver transplant is more Saskatchewan than myself, who was born and bred in this province.
Long story short -- TOO LATE!! I began calling in to the station on a semi-regular basis and in the meantime, managed to score a nice collection of goodies and prizes. I'll spare the details, but one of the best items I received was two tickets to see Finger Eleven at the Ex, which I attended with my best bro, Dan, who I also brought with me, when I received a $50 gift certificate to Tapps Sports Lounge. It got to the point where I was calling in so often that I felt I needed an identity. I'd hear other people, regulars, calling in and they all had nifty nicknames, but all of the nicknames that I have, seem too silly to broadcast on local radio. I love that online, I'm the one and only ToontownJuggalo, but people would react foolishly to that name, likely confusing the term "juggalo" for "gigolo" which would be greatly incorrect and mildly offensive, plus I get annoyed trying to repeatedly explain shit to people, so I avoided using that nickname. Another nickname that I've adopted in the last few months is Aardvark, which again, requires some explanation which I'm unwilling to do. So I stuck with who I am. I'm Jeff.
I'm Jeff, but I'm not just any Jeff. I'm The Jeff.
(Not actually a picture of me. I don't like sleeves
or turtle necks, but I'd kill for that hairline.)
I figured, any bumbling fool can be a Jeff. It's really not that difficult. I'm living proof of that. I've been stumbling through life for decades as Jeff and it's nothing spectacular. However, only a precious few or one, can be The Jeff and folks, that one and only, is this guy. Me. I'm now The Jeff, at least as far as calling in to the radio station. I needed something that would set me apart from everyone else and by Jove, I think I found it.
I could've went with That Jeff, but upon further retrospect, I decided that no one wants to That Jeff. Why would you? That guy is.... Well, That Jeff is one odd duck and as awesome as ducks go, the odd ones are just... weird. Of course, referring to oneself as "The", is a little strange in and of itself, but that's why I'm the Aardvark. Because I'm unique. 😁
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