My life flashed before my eyes, as I gazed back into the bowl to inspect the damage. The sight was a blood curdling crimson red. I was horrified at what might be afoot, now, with regards to my continuing spiraling health. In addition to the plethora of ailments that have plagued me over the past few years, I speculated that something truly sinister was invading my body and I would soon be visiting another battery of invasive medical specialists poking and prodding my body, humming and hawing with great speculation, wrought with supposition and very little certainty. More medical professionals labeling me an "odd duck", which is not a proper medical terminology.
What I saw in that toilet bowl was horrific. Like a murder scene from "Dexter". A few shards of muddied feculence blanketed with the deepest crimson colour. A colour so intense that if someone drove up in a hot rod of the same hue, it'd surely turn onlooker heads, but splashed inside the toilet bowl was true horror and a real cause for concern.
"What will become of my boy?" I thought, in reference to my cat. My mother is getting on in years and will be unable to take care of a feline friend. My sister already has a St. Bernard, whom my cat, Monkey, detests greatly, not to mention his dislike of children.
What of my other possessions? My house? My truck? My car? So many things that I have in my greedy hands that I don't want to share with others in the event of my untimely passing. What the hell am I going to...? Wait a second!!
"Awe, shit!!" I said, aloud, having just remembered I had beets for supper, last night. "That explains the ungodly sight."
What I saw in that toilet bowl was horrific. Like a murder scene from "Dexter". A few shards of muddied feculence blanketed with the deepest crimson colour. A colour so intense that if someone drove up in a hot rod of the same hue, it'd surely turn onlooker heads, but splashed inside the toilet bowl was true horror and a real cause for concern.
"What will become of my boy?" I thought, in reference to my cat. My mother is getting on in years and will be unable to take care of a feline friend. My sister already has a St. Bernard, whom my cat, Monkey, detests greatly, not to mention his dislike of children.
What of my other possessions? My house? My truck? My car? So many things that I have in my greedy hands that I don't want to share with others in the event of my untimely passing. What the hell am I going to...? Wait a second!!
"Awe, shit!!" I said, aloud, having just remembered I had beets for supper, last night. "That explains the ungodly sight."
An overwhelming sigh of relief erupted from my breath. I would survive, after all. What with all the healthy meals I've been preparing, as of late, I expect to live a very long time.., as dreadful as that idea is to bear.
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