The R-word

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A lone man stands on the curb, hacking and coughing. Nothing light like that which would erupt with mere dryness in one's throat, but a deep guttural hacking noise. A shrilling violence spouting from his throat. All the while, a smoldering cigarette in his hand, and I'm thinking, "You're a f*cking retard!!!"

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The "R"-word has been getting a lot of air time as of late, because Charlie Sheen allegedly used it in one of his tyrades. I heard him use it. I don't deny that he used it. BUT!! He used the word in the proper context. I'll explain momentarily.

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As far as I'm concerned, there are only a hand full of words in the english language that should be only identified by the letter it begins with. F*ck is one of them, although as any regular reader can testify to, it is rare, very rare, that I will use the F-word terminology. N-word, is another that should only be identified by way of the first letter only. This goes without saying. It is because there is such hate that follows the use of that enlongated word. Another word that should be identified this way, is the "Hairy C-word". This is a term that me and another fellow, with whom I once worked with, coined. He often would spout the actual word, which I find to be quite disgusting. Although nowadays, with the advent and people's general practice of hair removal from certain designated regions of the human body, it is likely that the word "hairy" could be dropped from the term altogether. As far as the term of "R-word", I feel that when used in the proper context, it's not an offensive word, but one that aptly describes someone who should know better, but tends to do stupid shit.

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Take for instance the afore mentioned fellow with the bad cough. Arguably it could be said that he's simply got a chest cold. However, the lit cigarette at his side, would propose an alternative reasoning behind the hacking cough. It's not normal for people to inhale smoke. They do, and I know tons of people who smoke, both in the past and the present. Still, it's not normal and should be abolished, as it can't be healthy. This lonesome loser hacking up his lung, between drags off his cigarette..? He's a retard!

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The word retard, as it is described in the dictionary, means to hinder or prevent. For example: if a material is described as flame retardant, it means it cannot be lit on fire. Flames are hindered. The material is coated with a substance that prevents it from being engulfed in flames.

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In decades past, the word retard was also used to describe those with mental difficiancies. It wasn't right, even though by definition it was somewhat accurate. However, these days, much like the use of the N-word, there is usually hate behind the use of the word. Those who don't understand. Those who use the word "retard" as a form of bigotry and hate towards those with mental handicaps, are actually the retards themselves. They should know better than to act that way towards anyone, let alone someone without the necessary social skills to defend themselves.

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Better education is needed in response to any and all of these questionable words, except maybe the hairy C-word. The only good that word poses, is that it sounds the same as when you slam the trunk on your car. That's the ONLY place where that belongs, although depending on the vehicle, that sound sometimes makes a clunk sound, instead.

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Better education, though. That's the reason I believe that it was wrong for publishers to go back and remove the N-word from Mark Twain's Huckleberry Finn. The use of the word was "a matter of fact". They said it passingly, in those days, and through proper education, can people move forward and recognize why the word is so wrong. Why the word is so hurtful. Sadly, these days too many people are afraid to offend, rather than trudge through and teach one another a valuable lesson.

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A few weeks back, people were shitting on Christina Aguilera for messing up the words to the American National Anthem. I say, lay off the chick. I, myself, have no idea what the words are to my own, Canadian National Anthem. Why? Because a few years ago, there were words in the song that "offended" people, so they changed the words. I believe that the words to "O Canada" have been changed on a couple of occasions, and as a result, I have no f*cking clue as to what all the words are anymore. So instead of leaving things as they were, and respecting the anthem as a piece of art, some asshole..., some retard, if you will, changed up the words and f*cked up for everyone.

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People should know better. Use common sense. Unfortunately, the most uncommon thing in the world, these days, is common sense. People would rather act retarded, than take a moment to think shit through. I was downtown yesterday for an important appointment. I found a parking spot directly in front of the offices, to which I was going to visit. On the parking meter, the dollar amounts were clearly written as follows: Each 25cents equalled 7.5 minutes. (So four quarters, or one dollar, would equal 30 minutes, right?) Each dollar coin equalled 60 minutes of curbside parking and every two dollar coin was 2 hours. Wait a dog gone minute. Four quarters equalled 30min of time, but a dollar coin equalled sixty minutes? That's kinda retarded, isn't it?

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Forest Gump's mother instilled in her son the words, "Stupid is as stupid does." Stupid shit is almost always done by retards. A man purposely turns off the highway and lodges his vehicle in four foot snowbank because he's looking for a shortcut..., is a retard. A person who buys a cup of coffee, spills it on themselves, then gets angry at the establishment because the coffee is hot..., is a retard. A person who eats two pizzas, two quarter pound burgers, and a 2 liter bottle of soda pop, then balloons up to 450lbs, only to blame the fast food restaurant who sold them the garbage food..., guess what? He's a retard too. The stupid bastard who smokes for thirty years, develops irreparable lung cancer, then sues the cigarette company..., is a f*cking retard. And someone with metal incapacities is NOT a retard, but the stupid sons of bitches who bully and call these fine people names, ARE retards.

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As far as my attempting to post an editorial of my own creation on the subject of the R-word and it's proper and improper use? Perhaps it's a retarded mission for trying to do so. Then again, maybe I'm a f*cking genius for trying to educate people, rather than keeping quiet.