Sunday, October 9, 2011

Backseat DRIVEr...

I read a boat-load of reviews about the movie "Drive" which stars Canadian heart-throb, Ryan Gosling. All the reviews about the flick came up quite positive, supplying all the "oohs" and "aahs" that are standard in the praising of a film. Even the movie previews online and that were briefly shown on television, seemed to boast the same appraisal of the movie. "Ground breaking!" said one rave. "Fresh and exciting!" read another. "The most original film in years!" was another positive review.

The preview that I viewed online, by my own admission, featured Gosling's character behind the wheel of a Mustang GT, pulling off some amazing stunts that I've not seen in years. Such excitement, were some of the maneuvers, that all the automobile stunts combined from the "Transporter Trilogy", seemed like a Sunday afternoon drive through the country, by comparison. Unfortunately... [Spoiler Alert] If you wish to see a movie chock-full of similar driving styles, you're better off to put the YouTube preview on repeat, because equally exciting stunts are not to be found in this movie.

Story-wise, I don't know who the critics were who claimed this movie to be "fresh" and "original", because it seemed like the same ol' formula movies that plague our movie screens week-to-week. Basically, this is a story about a mysterious loner, who is befriended by an attractive single-mother and the two become close, only to be confronted with her convict husband who comes back into the picture and soon lures the young mother of one into his dark criminal past, so in a moment of weakness, our "hero" steps up to help only to have the world come crumbling down around them all. You know, typical "boy-meets-girl-meets-convict husband-meets-dirtbag scum-meets-blood, murder & mayhem". We've seen it a thousand times.

So just when you thought the movie couldn't get much hokier, then there's a 180 degree flip and there ultra-violence that even made me a little disturbed. Just over-the-top violence that really didn't make much sense and... Oh... I don't want to waste any more of my time or thoughts on this decrepit shitty movie.

For those who haven't seen this movie, count your lucky stars and be thankful you never wasted your hard earned cash on this crap. This movie, "DRIVE" SUCKS MAJOR ASS!!! For those who spent their money, contributing to the $27M+, I am dreadfully sorry for your loss. And for those offering up such rave reviews..., when did you sell your souls, you lying piece of shit c*cks*ckers?!?

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